Monday, February 13, 2006
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The author is listening to: Simple plan - Welcome to my Life
I have always been wondering why i'm getting more patient with my folks. For example, though we shoot each other with phrases, i don't get angry. I just shoot for the sake of sending my point across. I want them to know my perception of the matter that we are arguing vehemently on.
Well, i have the answer now. It suddenly strucked me while i was having dinner and arguing at the same time. The problem here is, i don't keep my mouth shut at the right time. I politely told them to have dinner and that triggered the series of arguments. It's about me coming home late and not doing what i'm supposed to do at home. So, what are the things that i'm supposed to do? They believe it's sweeping the floor, ironing my clothes etc. I'm a student, does that falls under my job scope or a homemaker's?
I don't mind helping out a little if i'm free. The thing is, i am not! My folks believe that i'm very free just because i always hang out late outside for the past few days. I did my work outside. I just like to do my homework outside. Reason being my house is noisy, often filled with the yellings and screamings of the homemaker as well as the breadwinner.
They are too much. They crossed my boundaries today, simply throwing groundless accusations on me. There's just this urge to keep my mouth shut, move out and not talk to them forever. My dad was bathing when i quarrelled with my mum while having dinner. To my surprise, he came out of the bathroom 5 minutes later without yelling at me. He simply walked into the kitchen, grabbed a drink and left. I guess i hit the bull's eye.
I believe it's a fact that i'm not his child, why do i say so? Basically, he agreed to share the cost of my internet service since my brother is using. Now, he backed out since his old WIN98 pc doesn't meet the minimum requirements of the broadband service. What does it show? The second child is his and i'm not. Frankly, i'm not really bothered by this incident, it's just to prove the point i mentioned earlier.
Right now, he's trying to teach my sister to spell a few words. Teach as in, yelling at the child, instilling fear in the child, hoping to see results. Needless to say, he lost his temper and the poor little child is crying now. Why these people don't see the fact that a child cannot learn under harsh environment, constant fear and pressure? I'm not saying pressure is bad, but moderation is the key. Most importantly, i believe in giving a child a happy childhood for him/her to recount on when this child grows up into an adult.
Back to track, the reason why i am growing more patient with them. The reason is, i sympathize with them. They are still under the curse of the law -- adam's disobedience. Welcome to my life is a song by simple plan. Nice music, meaningful lyrics. I would have been sad listening to this song a year back, but hey, i'm not the old Nicholas anymore. Who cares about whether your family is for you now? All forms of evidences show that you aren't the most important to them. So what? Ya my question is so what?
Ok i'm a jerk. Piggy, i'm anticipating what are you going to tell me later. The conclusion of the entries. In any case, thanks for accompanying me to the fireworks show for 5 days, tolerating my nonsense throughout and carrying my bag though you were reluctant.
I have to work hand in hand with Jesus for a better future. I will be more determined dispite the lack of support from my family. Just to side track a little, don't i deserve a valentine for tomorow?
"I have given you authority to trample on snakes and scorpions and to overcome all the power of the enemy; nothing will harm you." Luke 10:19
Are You Ga(me)?, 9:16 PM.
