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Saturday, March 17, 2012 <data:blog.pageTitle/>

很多人常以“非笔墨所能形容”来说明他们的心情。但怎么没人用“非笔墨、言语所能形容”呢?此时此刻,我的心情正是入此。“背叛”这两个字我常听说,但万万也没想到这回却发生在自己身上。

发生了这样的事,我应改有怎样的反应呢?我应改怎么去处理?想了好久,我也想不透。本以为如果自己遇到这种事情,我会很果断去处理。但是背叛如果混和了感情,这就成为了非常棘手的一件事。对于发生了什么事,我也不想再这里加以解释。

你,告诉我怎么做吧!其实我很害怕,也进退两难。当你在叙述这件事的来龙去脉,我很心痛,但不知怎么的,心里想的都是你。想着我该怎样才能把你欠佳的心情挪开,待给你快乐之类的。令我觉得好奇的是,我为什么当时并不是想要怎么处置你?要怎么对你所叙述的事情做出反应?

以下是我正在思考的顾虑:

第一,如果放弃了,我会不会后悔?

第二,如果这么轻易就放过你,你以后是否会重蹈覆辙?

第三,如果你重蹈覆辙,我会不会有勇气离开你?

第四,如果我不放弃,对你的信任会不会回到以前的程度?即使会,又需要耗费多少时间?

第五,你似乎无动于衷,又回到以前的你,当作什么事都没发生过。我说你今天应该送我回家,因为你带了给我这么大的伤害。但,准备回家之余你还问我需不需要你送我回家。这是你如此段暂得记忆吗?还是你根本就不把他当一回事儿?

第六,你为什么当时会做出这样的决定?

虽然还活着,但是感觉自己已经无法呼吸。信任是我非常重视的一点。这样的背叛,我不知道该如何面对。我无法在你面前露出我脆弱的一面。不过现在,多在自己的窝里,我感觉自己好像被五马分尸,心被碎尸万段。你说你能理解我的感受,因为自己已经觉得很难过。我跟你说,除非我也对你做出同样的背叛,你永远都不会理解我的感受。不,我不会这样做。我不会把自己放在那么卑微的处境。

是你,让我对爱情充满信心。也是你,让我对爱情产生疑惑、恐惧。

Are You Ga(me)?, 11:15 PM.
Sunday, August 21, 2011 <data:blog.pageTitle/>


It seems I've lost the passion for blogging.

But no, there's just too much to bear with in my life for me to talk about here.

I read my blog entries when I was 16 again..it just seems so childish..immature.

"it's a funny raw feeling that you can't get out of a world-hardened adult."

Yep I guess so, that kids will be kids and dreams will be dreams.

Are You Ga(me)?, 8:41 PM.
Wednesday, June 08, 2011 <data:blog.pageTitle/>

5 minutes ago, I checked my phone..now, I am checking my phone..5 minutes later, I will be checking my phone.

Maybe I just need to come to terms with the truth that's right in front of me.

Perhaps my mind just got fucked a hundred times.

Probably you're just seeking attention. Auf wiedersehen.

Are You Ga(me)?, 9:42 PM.
Wednesday, April 13, 2011 <data:blog.pageTitle/>

You're my angel, my soulmate, my partner, my protector, my life.

Have I ever told you before, that You're a God send?

Let's spend our lives together,

always (and forever).

Are You Ga(me)?, 7:26 PM.
Thursday, April 07, 2011 <data:blog.pageTitle/>

I'm constantly on a journey to somewhere where I feel I'd truly belong.

Until that happens, I've just gotta make do and live with it.

If I could choose, I'd rather be oblivious.

Wearisome, really.

Are You Ga(me)?, 10:42 PM.
Sunday, April 03, 2011 <data:blog.pageTitle/>

Is there a word that best describe simultaneous elation and sorrow?

I do not wish to open my mouth.

Leave me alone, all of you.

Frustrating, really.

Are You Ga(me)?, 10:18 PM.
Sunday, February 06, 2011 <data:blog.pageTitle/>


February's the month of change; change towards life, change in attitude, change in perspective.

"As long as we know we love each other and we're fighting for the better, it's ok if we don't see each other as often."

That, I totally agree.

Let us celebrate Valentine's Month.

Are You Ga(me)?, 10:02 PM.

Sa(me), much.


I want to be this; I want to be that. I want to be everything in the world. I'm not très fou, neither am I très beau. I just want to be me, and I hope you'll like it.
My fa(me).
nicholas ethan lim: already 21, birthday falls on 11 September 1988. Realised that even between the closest human beings infinite distances continue, a wonderful living side by side can grow, if they succeed in loving the distance between them, that will make it possible for each to see the other whole against the sky.
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